Netflix Reviews

So, I've decided to review my Netflix rentals every now and then, because my opinion is very important. These aren't going to be in depth, pages long reviews. Those are boring. No one except the geekiest of film geeks reads those. If anyone reads a film review, they basically want to know if the movie sucks or not. So, that's what I'm going to try to do. Tell you if the movie sucks in as few words as I can.

Rocky IV
Over the top, yet still awesome. See Rocky run up a mountain in Russia. See Rocky defeat a man twice his size. See Rocky end the Cold War. Drago is awesome.


The Fighting Kentuckian
Standard Wayne movie. Except with Oliver Hardy in it. This, makes it a must see. It's Hardy, of Laurel & Hardy. Anyone understand the meaning of that? No one got the joke in the Borat movie.


High Plains Drifter
I was put off by this movie at first... very confusing. Until the last five minutes, when it's revealed why Clint was doing what he was doing and why it is fucking badass. Watch it, to be blown away at the end.


Robocop
Peter Wells is a freaky looking bastard, even before he's Robocop. Incredibly violent. Kind of awesome, in a strange way.


Rocky V
Absolutely ridiculous. Only see it if you want to laugh at a silly, stupid movie.


Predator
Classic fucking Ahnold. "GET TO THE CHOPPER" "If it bleeds, we can kill it." Plus, Carl fucking Weathers. If Tobias likes him, I like him.


The Running Man
Book was better, and that was written by Stephen King. So, whatever that means.


Total Recall
More classic Ahnold. Plus, a midget with a gun. Plus, a woman with three boobs. Must. Fucking. See.


Rollerball
Too long, but the brutal cold-hearted violence makes up for it.


At Close Range
If that picture of Walken doesn't make you want to see this film, we shouldn't be friends.